“We stand on the shoulders of the women who came before us, women who had to fight for the rights that we now take for granted”

Lean In, Sherly Sandberg 

This is a quote I regularly reflect on, one that gives me a multitude of emotions. At times comfort, at others a reality-check and at all times the guardrails of what I want my legacy to be.

As I write on International Women’s Day, I remind myself of the powerful role models and ‘shoulders’ I have been lucky to have had. My grandmother, who made many sacrifices, but taught me life was about experiences. My mother, who taught that elegant determination opens doors. CEOs I’ve worked with who have given me the confidence that I can. And my pals who keep me real. They all feature in what I am today.

But let’s be honest. It’s not been easy. And I know I don’t always get it right as I juggle being a successful mum of teens and the business leader I aspire to be. My journey has been full of powerful experiences. Some have been awesome and positively life-changing. Others grim, and ones I will never forget. 

This year’s International Women’s Day theme is #embracequity. The aim is to ensure the understanding that equality and equity have different meanings, and that both need recognition and a defined place in our culture. 

• Equality means each individual or group of people is given the same resources or opportunities.

• Equity recognizes that each person has different circumstances, and allocates the exact resources and opportunities needed to reach an equal outcome.

I’ve had first-hand experience with equitable processes being in place, and with situations where they have most definitely been not. 

Throughout my career, I’ve had many different needs, both from a personal perspective - such as when I became a mum - but also as I grow older. Special moments in my life that bring a lot of joy, but also a spectrum of feelings, emotions, and physical challenges to overcome. 

I’ve always known that I wanted to work and have a progressive career clambering up the ladder, giving me the ability to earn my own money and independence. And I've always known I wanted a family. What I didn’t know was how to manage both of these. 

We are lucky in the UK to have equality and equity in statutes and regulations, protecting against discrimination when we are pregnant and after we have given birth. We have statutory rights as parents. Time off for antenatal care, maternity, and parental leave. We also have forward-thinking organisations that support working mums, and I have been lucky enough to work for some of them. Part-time work, flexible hours, and emergency time off when the kids were poorly have all been available to me without hesitation. 

Conversely, society did not afford me the same equity. Being pregnant on a busy tube on the Northern Line was a total shock. Not freely giving one’s seat up for someone in more need than yourself shows a total lack of human respect. Surely our society doesn’t need to rely on signposts on the tube to remind us of common decency. 

So with the sleep deprivation, feelings of incompetence, and generally operating in a rolling sphere of chaos, there were times when I wasn’t fair to myself. Something I wished I had learnt was the true meaning of resilience. Resilience is not just about ploughing on with no disregard for yourself. It’s about understanding your boundaries, being kind to yourself, and knowing when to stop. But with all the challenges and emotions - some of which continue today - my children and family are the most rewarding part of my life. They are my rock, my soul, and I love them to the moon and back.

Without them, I don’t think I would have been able to deal with the very prominent inequitable moments in my career. I chose a career in technology because it sounded fun. The ability to build neural network models at university blew my mind. The realisation of the actual practical application of skill, while working on a busy IT help desk, was quickly understood. However, helping people to use tech, for positive outcomes, has always been at the core of why I love what I do. 

But a rewarding and fulfilling career has to be worked at. You have to be resilient and motivated to overcome. But when I look back, I see inequality and inequity, not just for me, but for the people around me. I’ve had to work hard to get my head raised above the parapet. At times it felt as if I was unheard, or even nonexistent. I’ve known my face didn’t fit for opportunities, and that opinions formed without me even being in the room. I don’t dwell on any of this. I’ve moved on and achieved what I set out to do. These past moments have developed me into the leader I aspire to be. 

When I read this article to my teen boys, they asked why it was just about women. I take that as a ‘winning moment’ of being a mum. Because they are absolutely right! These issues are really about all of us. Every race, gender, age, and physical or neuro diversity. Embracing equity fundamentally means that we embrace diversity, and that we embrace inclusion.

My journey will not stop focusing on having a positive impact. Everyone has a place at my table. 

I’ve come to the point in my life where I know what my soul needs. I need to take time to look after my wellbeing through diet and exercise. I need organisation and a firm bedrock from which I can play. And as a leader, I know the role I want to play. Enabling and supporting the fantastic creativity I have within my team, while creating a positive environment for them to be the best they can be. ‘We are what you do’ is at the centre of how we think at Fourth Floor. And as a leader I commit to building a work culture that is equitable, enabling and rewarding the great people who want to work for us. 

Those shoulders I have leant on… I have taken the baton. It’s securely in my hands and being taken forward.